MARRIAGE/RELATIONSHIP 2014: HOW DO YOU KNOW THE LORD GOD’S CHOICE OF LIFE –PARTNER: HUSBAND OR WIFE? Part Two Concluded
I am back. This column was on a one-week hiatus but it seems like an eon. I was engrossed in putting to bed our new book titled: “Coming to America, 1001 Ways to Immigrate to the USA and Canada Now, Including Australia, Belize, Denmark, Iceland, Finland, The Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, New Zealand, and Uruguay” which is now on sale (http://allternativecommunication.net/the-book.php). I thank all readers of this column that called, and or sent email to inquire about me and the Lord God's assignment on this page. I didn't know there are ardent admirers of this column who look forward to it every week. Again, I say thank you all for your affection and concerns. As the Word of Life says, when we sow a seed of salvation unto the assembly, the Holy Spirit Himself ensures the harvest as the seed grows but the sower is blessed and refreshed; consequently, iron then sharpens iron. In all these, the Glory belongs to our Lord God and him alone. Those who called or sent email are encouragers as Barnabas, the son of Encouragement assisted Apostle Paul in all his earthly ministrations (Acts 4: 37). As I have pointed out in this column in the past, Encouragement is a ministry many children of God aren't aware of as a separate ministry on its own (1 Corinthians 12: 28). There are some people gifted with the ministry of helps which include encouragement. Many children of God are down; despondent, depressed and often times feel completely spiritually enervated. Even pastors and other frontline pilgrims can be zapped of spiritual energies at times and they need to be encouraged. This is where other children of God come in as encouragers. A classic example of an encourager in the Old Testament was Abigail (1 Samuel 25). All those fellow Christian brethren that inquired of my column and disturbed about the abrupt hiatus of this column are encouragers and I am eternally grateful to them. Now back to where we left off penultimate week.
We itemized six Holy Spirit-directed steps that every single should take in settling down this year. Those first six steps are spiritual and soulical: individually as humans, we are a tripartite being; man as spirit, soul and body, just as the Lord God Almighty is Tripartite in His Being; God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit and the Three are One (Genesis 1:1-3). This Godhead Personality was replicated in human beings in Genesis 1: 26-27; Genesis 2: 7; 1 Thessalonians 5: 23). In your preparation to settle down with a man or a woman as Christian couples, the requirements of the spirit must be dealt with first which we explained in part one of this article, followed by the requirements of the soul which we also explained in part one. In this final and concluding part, we want to explain the six requirements for the body. In our spiritually-blind world, it's unfortunate that when the issue of marriage is discussed, the requirements of the body come first which is wrong. In all things, the pattern that God sets and establishes for dealing with His children is this in spiritual order: spirit, soul and body. After the fall, Satan reversed it to this demonic pattern: body, soul and spirit. While Satan works from the outside to the inside; the Lord God Almighty works the other way; from the inside to the outside. This is a spiritual law and if you are a Christian and haven't grasped this fundamental spiritual law, you will always operate in confusion; you will not and cannot understand God and be incapable of hearing His Voice. Your inability to understand this spiritual law will also hamper your judgment of human beings, including your Godly chosen wife or husband. You see, the physical body of a human being doesn't control that person; the real person is the spirit that is inside such a human being. As our Lord Jesus Christ said in John 6: 63a: It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing…” The woman or man you see walking and talking on the “outside” is not the “real” person, until you know what spirit controls the man or woman. The inability of Christians to separate these “inside” and the “outside” principle in spiritual function has brought a lot of confusion, heartbreak, disappointment, weeping and crying to the lives of many couples. “I didn't know he was such a dog!” a sister cried out unto me on the phone from Oklahoma after her five year marriage crashed. She complained endlessly of abuse, unutterable nightmares and weird things after she married the man she thought was her man. “If I had known I would not have married him” another Christian brother belched out to his supposed Christian sister who he thought was God's choice for him. “I didn't know she was hiding all along,” the brother complained to me. I told him she wasn't hiding, she had been like that all along but you didn't” know” her. The “know” there is the spirit that is controlling the Christian sister and if two of you are spiritually incompatible, that marriage cannot work, because how can two people walk together if they do not agree? (Amos 3: 3).
That verse isn't talking about born-again Christians and unbelievers as it is traditionally understood. Two Christians can be in a relationship and yet do not agree. Is it possible? Yes, it is. Papa Abraham and Mama Sarah were undoubtedly children of God but they didn't agree on the promise of God to give them a child and that was why Mama Sarah convinced Papa Abraham to sleep with Hagar (Genesis 16). Moses and Zipporah couldn't agree on the plan of God for Moses to lead the children of Israel to the Promised Land, because Zipporah preferred to have Moses to herself as her loving and darling husband rather than “waste” in the wilderness. That was why she returned to Midian with their two boys (Exodus 18). The two of them didn't agree on the will of God for Moses and so Moses had to remarry (Numbers 12: 1-5). Apostle Paul and Apostle Peter-two great men, full of the Holy Spirit, the former sent to the Gentiles and the latter sent to the Jews both at home and the Dispersion disagreed and verbally fought in Galatia even though they were true servants of God. They didn't agree on the issue of circumcision which led to verbal altercation between two Holy Spirit-filled men of God (Galatians 2: 11-21). When the Bible says born-again Christians should not consort with non-believers, it says “Do not be unequally-yoked” (2 Corinthians 6: 14), but when Amos 3: 3 says; “Two cannot walk together unless they have agreed to do so,” he was referring to two believers as well. The word: “agree” there is the same word used for “testament” which also means agreement, hence marriage is an agreement and until the two in the journey of life; man and woman in the marital relationship agree to walk in the specific will of God-not general will please because there is a difference-that marriage cannot stand even when the brother and sister are born-again, Holy Spirit-filled children of God. A brother was called to be a pastor, while a sister says she too has also heard from God that she should be a missionary. Can both walk together? Think about it.
THE BODILY REQUIREMENTS FOR CHOOSING A CHRISTIAN LIFE PARTNER
These are the six things to look for in your choice of life partner as a Christian single which border on the body or what I have chosen to call: “bodily requirements” just as we have examined the requirements for the spirit and soul in part one of this article.
7. Financial Compatibility: Money is needed in all ramifications of life, including marriage. The financial status of your partner is important in terms of his/her ability to make money. This requires prayers, because most often times, we children of the Most High God do not always make money as the world does. Satan gives physical money to his people and dictates to them how and what to use the money for. Get this straight; God didn't create money, for had it not been the fall, Adam and Eve and by extension you and I as their children would not need money (Genesis 2). Satan invented money through worldly leadership to reward those who worship him and withstand/oppose those who are worshipping the Lord God Almighty. Rarely does the Lord give money directly to His children, but by practice causes His children to birth Godly ideas through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit which in turn create money that we only need for our basic necessities: food, clothing and shelter. The Lord prefers to prosper us rather than give us material wealth. He knows physical wealth has no significance in eternity. The love for money, Paul says in 1 Timothy 6: 10, is the root of all kinds of evil, thus the question for you when assessing your potential mates' financial capability is; can he/she support him or herself? The world has erroneously believe that it is the man's responsibility to cater, feed, house and clothe the woman by referring to 1 Timothy 5: 8 where Paul says: “But if anyone does not provide for his own, especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” This has been twisted to refer to the husband. Read the whole chapter again, especially the first seven verses preceding these words. Paul was referring to widows. Zipporah was a princess and a rich daughter of the king of Midian and richer by far than Moses. She provided for their two boys: Gershom and Eliezer without Moses, the man of God. The meanings of the names of the two sons would give you a clue on the financial relationship in the family. Women were those supplying the material needs of our Lord Jesus Christ and the disciples (Luke 8: 2). There is nowhere in scripture that Christian couples working and doing the will of God should apportion financial roles to either the husband or the wife. Everything is supposed to be owned jointly, period. If anyone is a contented individual who knows that outside the three basic necessities of life: food, clothing and shelter (Mathew 6: 25-34), the rest are luxuries, he/she will have the Holy Spirit knowledge to evaluate the financial status of his/her potential mate. If your mate satisfies the first six requirements of the Spirit contained in the first part of this article, the Almighty God will provide for you as our Lord Jesus Christ said, “the laborer is worthy of his hire” ( Luke 10:7). Paul repeated same in 1 Timothy 5: 18, thus if you and your spouse have agreed on the purpose of God for your life and the Christian woman has known this through the Holy Spirit from the word go, the Lord God has decreed it that those who preach the gospel must eat from the gospel as well. As Apostle Paul disclosed in 1 Corinthians 9: 14: In the same way, the Lord has commanded that those who preach the gospel should receive their living from the gospel.” A sister told me that the man that God has brought to her as her future husband is not what she wants. Does he have a job? I asked her. “No” she answered. “He said is a pastor, we can't live on that?” I laughed. That pastoral job is more than the job of President Barack Obama, I told her. The world is consumed by money, dollars and papers, but tell me, which job is the most honorable in the entire universe and in eternity than the work of someone called by the Lord of lords, the Kings of kings and the Omnipotent and Omnipresent Lord od of the heavens, the earth and all that are in them as His own on earth? All these so-called presidents, governors, senators, company directors, earthly kings and the rest so-called successful men and women of the world by worldly standard will be astounded when they get to the Other Side that nothing, virtually nothing is recorded in their files about their earthly accomplishments. I had to lecture the Christian sister and I hope she got it.
8. The Issue of Family Size and Number of Children: - You and your future partner should discuss and agree on the size of your family. This is very important. Yes, the Lord God commanded in Genesis 1: 28: “Be fruitful and multiply…” but that was before the fall of Adam and Eve. That was the original plan of God, but the disobedience of our First Parents kyboshed that command so if you become fruitful now and multiply beyond your means, you are a fool and also an unwise person. Depending on your financial status and the plan of God Almighty for the two of you which should have been revealed and obvious to both of you by now at this stage, you should now prayerfully and jointly decide how many children you want to raise as a family. You do not need to seek the face of the Lord Jesus Christ in this, because this is your decision as a couple. Here is how to make this decision; what is God's will or earthly assignment for you and which roles will your children play? If you are called to be missionaries for instance, can you stand the rigors of moving a large family from one locale to another? If you are apostles, which future roles will your children play until they are 21 years old? (Numbers 14: 29). These are issues you should discuss and agree tentatively on them as two Christians planning your lives together to serve the Lord and carry out His assignments for your life on earth.
9. Relationship with Families: This is also important. The lady should be able to know the type of relationship her future husband has with his parents, if they are alive. Similarly, the man should also know what type of relationship his future wife has with her parents. You don't need to ask, but you can observe and make some deductions through the Holy Spirit. There is a poignant aspect of this that the Lord God commanded in the Decalogue which is found in Exodus 20: 12 which say: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.” This is where this honoring of parents begins; your marriage, whether you are a Christian brother or sister. I will give a real-life example. Brother A and Sister B were born-again Christians when they met and as they prepared for their wedding, their parents weren't believers so they went to their church to explain things to their pastor. The pastor doesn't know much about the Word so they agreed that since the parents of the bride and bridegroom were non-believers; their presence didn't matter so the wedding went ahead. Everything went well happily thereafter but about five years into the relationship; everything and anything that could go wrong in the marriage started. The couples lost their jobs and with two kids to look after, life was hellish for them; they couldn't pay their bills, to buy groceries in the house was difficult. They fasted, prayed, and did all the elementary spiritual things we do when we can't understand what is going on. Although their parents eventually sizzled out and embraced the marriage, but pride prevented them from reaching out to them for financial assistance. After all, they were against this marriage in the first place so if we go to them now, we will hear those frightening words: Didn't we tell you? But spiritually speaking, that was the genesis of their problem. You see, the Lord God Almighty is a God of Order and He will never change (Hebrews 13: 8). He will not alter His Laws simply because we are now His own, in fact, He expects us to fulfill them. Satan and his demons know these spiritual laws like the back of their palms except they do not submit to those laws and continually make sure human beings do not obey such laws also. That is why billions of souls are perishing today. For us as born again Christians, the main artifice of Satan is ignorance (Hosea 4: 6). If only the pastor of the church where the wedding took place had spiritual knowledge, he/she would have told the couples what the Word of God says. The marital problems began ever before the wedding but unbeknownst to the young Christian couples, they thought they had sinned or some witches or wizards were after them. As the fictive philosopher, Pogo once said; “We have seen the enemy; it is us.” Anyway, the truth came for the couples when a man of God gifted with discernment (1 Corinthian 12: 10c) came visiting. A short prayer in their living room prompted one single question from the man of God: “Tell me, what happened on the day of your wedding?” The couples looked askance at each other. You see, the parents weren't evil or satanic but Satan knew the young Christian couples had disobeyed Exodus 20: 5 and so was exploiting their ignorance to make their lives difficult. It was that first sin that opened the demonic doorway into their marriage and hell was let lose. Thank God for the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit told the man of God what should be done and the changes were immediate. Brethren, it is good to pray and fast, but everything is not prayer until you know what to pray on and for (James 4:3). One of these days, the Holy Spirit will tell me to write about how we born-again Christians should honor our parents. There are four major events in the life of every born-again Christian that we should honor our parents and we will explain in a future article. The bottom line; know all these facts before you consummate your marriage.
10. Physical Appearance: Every human being that has ever been created, and will ever be created by the Lord God Almighty is physically attractive. We are beautifully and wonderfully made as the Psalmist says (Psalm 139: 14) and each and every one of us is God's Masterpiece. According to scripture, no human being is ugly and so whether to marry someone or not should not be based on physical appearance. In my co-authored book; “The Kingdom of Satan Exposed,” the Holy Spirit revealed to us that about 60 percent of all the world's pagan rituals, demonic festivals and Satanic celebrations couched as traditions and customs were engineered by demons that appeared as physically-attractive women in flesh to put human beings in bondage through sexual intercourse. Greek mythologies are full of stories and fables of demons that took the forms of physical human flesh in attractive and irresistible ways to lure great men into the Nether Gloom. Remember the Sirens, daughters of Phorcys in Homer's Odyssey in the Greek Mythology? It all started in the Garden of Eden when our First Mother fell into Satan's temptation when we read in Genesis 3: 6: “…when the woman saw…” As they say, not everything we see appears as they seem to the eyes and not all that glitter is gold. Ever watch that 1977 movie “The Devil's Advocate” directed by Taylor Hackford and starring Al Pacino as leading protagonist? Dr Margie, my wife loves that movie, because it reveals t us what exactly happens behind the façade of earthly accomplishment and the interplay of negative spiritual forces in a world of vain gloriousness.
11. The next issue is the Trust Issue. If you cannot trust a man in all ramifications of life, including money and financial matters, fidelity and other fundamental issues, then you don't and should not marry such a man or woman. This is to the Glory of the Lord God Almighty; I have never slept with any woman in my life after I got married to the woman I knew that the Holy Spirit revealed to me as my real wife and helpmate. When a Christian cheats on his/her spouse, it is because you do not really love the woman or man. When you meet your God-sent man or woman, you will not cheat on him/her, because it is not about him/her but about your relationship with the Lord God Almighty. You must pray very early in your relationship for the Holy Spirit to reveal to you how to trust your future wife or husband. Any Christian brother who cheats on you while you're dating will cheat on you when you become his wife, I don't care whether he is a pastor or man of God, period! He is not for you, as simple as that. Ditto for the Christian sister.
12. Finally, where and how will you meet your future husband or wife? Please don't be a troglodyte here for the Lord God Almighty is expanding opportunities to spread the Gospel through many channels and formats and wherever the Good News is preached is also a legitimate avenue to meet your helpmate as a Christian sister. Be broadminded and do not be cocooned to your small part of the world.
P.S We shall treat some of the letters sent in by fellow brethren next week.
PREDICTIONS AND PROPHECIES: The Lord God Almighty told the Israelites in Deuteronomy 18: 22: “If what a prophet proclaims in the name of the LORD does not take place or come true, that is a message the LORD has not spoken. That prophet has spoken presumptuously, so do not be alarmed.” Throughout the entire Holy Bible, both OT and NT, this verse is the rule of thumb to judge anyone who prophesies in the Name of the Sovereign Lord of the heavens and the earth. As the year 2103 closed in December, the Lord revealed certain things to me which I wrote as predictions and prophecies for the year 2014 on events around the world (Read the prophecies and predictions here http://nigeriaworld.com/feature/publication/fayemiwo/123013.html ) I had never done this in my life but when the Holy Spirit instructed you to do something you do it. I have only one boss-the Lord God Who sent me- so I do not care about what people say. It doesn't matter what names I am called. Now we are just 30 days into 2014 so let's crosscheck the fulfillment of some of these prophecies. EUROPE: The Lord God Almighty says…, He will show His anger and displeasure through weather. The climatic conditions and weather problems experienced throughout Europe last year will be a child's play as to the harsh weather and climatic conditions that are in the offing. (The Second and subsequent parts will elucidate more on each of the nations in the EU).” In the second and concluding part of the prophecies pointedly as it affects the United States, I wrote through revelation of the Holy Spirit: “The Lord God Almighty says He will continue to demonstrate His displeasure with the United States, because of our sins through nature and climate; desertification, drought, tornado, cyclone, hurricanes and the likes which will be unusual this year.” Anyone who chuckles that this is normal should think twice. This year's snowstorm is just the beginning, please wait till summer 2014. In the same prophetic revelation, the Holy Spirit revealed through us thus: “Gov. Chris Christie should be careful not to fall into a scandal this year which will threaten his presidential ambition.” This was before the George Washington Bridgegate Scandal and Hoboken Issue and Hurricane Sandy frauds came into the open. I didn't know Gov. Chris Christie of New Jersey from Adam, but here is what the Spirit is saying right now; he –Christie-will not contest the US Presidential Election in 2016. As a matter of fact, he should be careful not to be impeached or sent to jail. Come back to this article in the next two years between now and 2016 and crosscheck the fulfillment of this prophecy. Keep this for your records.
In the same prophetic revelation, I wrote through the Holy Spirit: “More school shootings are coming this year 2014.” Well, if you live here in the United States, you know that is being fulfilled. Now, let me disclose the full prophecy, because sometimes one holds back some of these things because they are very disturbing, yet can one censor the Holy Spirit? God is so annoyed with America that throughout this year, there will always be a school shooting or random act of shooting every month. Write this down. In the same prophetic revelation, we wrote: “There will be plane crashes, unpredictable weather conditions and hostile climatic condition.” Pay particular attention to the last seven words: “unpredictable weather conditions and hostile climatic conditions.” Ask the people of Atlanta Georgia and watch the CNN for what played out in that city and state in the last few days and the hellish experiences of commuters. They should know whether these prophecies and predictions are accurate or not. One of these days, do not be surprised that Miami will experience what just played out in Atlanta, Georgia.
Again, the Holy Spirit told me to write: “More political, media and Holly wood stars, ladies/women and top shots will come out openly as gays and lesbians this year.” Did you watch Queen Latifah's mass wedding officiating during 56th Grammy Awards on ABC? More and more of these are coming and pity those who say these are made up in the first 30 days of 2014. Surely, the Only One Who knows what is yet to come is the Sovereign Lord of the heavens and the earth and all that are in them; the Jehovah Lord God Almighty, Hallelujah! He reveals all these things to His prophets (Amos 3: 7).
Next Week: We will look at the reason why the Lord God Almighty instituted marriage among humans? What was His purpose? Will there be marriages in heavens? How will husbands and wives live in paradise? How about our children? In short, what is the state of the family in eternity? How about hell? We see next week.
*Dr. Fayemiwo, CEO, Alternative Lifestyle Communication, DBA Chicago and co-author of the latest book: “Coming to America,” is head of Global Missions and professor of Biblical Exegesis at Kingdom Bible College and Seminary, Tucson, Arizona, USA. He can be reached at [email protected] Visit his company's website: http://www. allternativecommunication.net/