CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE

Last week, I wrote that Parents need to be close to their children and they should always ask for a daily report of whatever happened while they were away so as to have a knowledge of whatever transpired between their kids and other people such as their school mates, class teacher e.t.c

I also said Parents should endeavor to let kids from 18 months and above know the appropriate names of their private parts...e.g Penis, Vagina lol. There is no point shying away from it o! Some Parents have actually raised their concerns to me that giving children exposure to sensitive issue as this could arouse their curiosity!

My answer to such Parents has always been the curiosity of the child would be towards self awareness and his sexuality, how to protect his/her body from a Predator. At the end of it all, their curiosity would be around 'positively' and not 'negatively'

The mistakes a lot of our Youths/singles and even we adults Have made is mainly due to lack of proper sex education. The only sex education we had was “If a man touches you, you will carry belle"lol

Mind you, a lot of young ladies know how to do it and not carry belle! lol Many girls became sexually active right from ridiculous ages while a lot of them get rid of pregnancies, many never got pregnant.....What am I trying to say here is that the 'archaic' sexual education we were given isn't helping nowadays because the kids we're having now are not the ones who played ten ten, suwe, e. t.c. They are kids who watch cartoons, Nolly wood films, kids who listen to songs like Dbanj, Wizkid which aren't helping them in anyway but rather making them more aware of erotic/ dirty things that if they aren't given the needed adequate information about their sexuality, I fear o!

It's more intense because many of the adults(which includes their teachers, uncles, aunties, Cousins) who are supposed to guide these children are also looking for how to take advantage of them sexually .The world isn't getting any better and as a result every child must be informed even though we can't say our protection over our children is absolute........All the same, we can do our best as Parents to give our kids the adequate protection they need until when they reach the age they will become accountable/responsible for their actions or inactions.

I will start with children between ages 18 months -3 yrs old.

Children between these age group must:
1.Be able to identify their body parts.
2. Pronounce proper names for body parts
3.Differentiate btw private and public parts.
4. Learn how to protect their private parts.
5. Know the four golden rules.
We need to understand the traits children between this age group exhibits....

-They are more aware of themselves and their environment.

-They imitate what they see people do especially their Parents.

-They follow simple commands and understand simple questions.

-They don't understand consequences of things, so they try to touch everything.

-They can learn 50 words every month @ 2 yrs.
-Their own way of saying no is by throwing temper tantrums and demonstrate stubbornness.

The truth is that children within this age group rely/depend on their Parents for 'absolute protection' because they can't identify a Pedophile when he/she starts touching their bodies, take for instance a 2 yr old girl cant scream NO in a messy situation so the bulk job is on the Parent.

Please protect your children, keep a watch on them. Don't b careless with those innocent kids. One mother left her two yr old girl with her neighbor(that was actually the second time),to her amazement, she noticed her girl was bleeding from her private part, the innocent girl uttered a statement *Mummy it hurts*to cut the long story short the man had been inserting his big Penis into the vagina of a two yr old girl.......

Believe me, Pedophiles are everywhere, don't trust anybody with your kids. I for instance, I don't care whatever anybody says about my attempt in giving my innocent kids absolute protection. People will surely say u ar being overly protective but I'm comfortable that way because that is my primary business as a Parent! Apart from Pedophiles, there are also bad children everywhere; I shared a story of a man who told me that @ d age of 5, he had lost count of the no of girls he had had sex with.

In a particular school I know very well, a little girl (a Nursery 2 pupil) confided in me that two boys in her class had inserted their penis in her vagina right in the school premises! Unbelievable you would say. A lot of Proprietors are only after money, to make matters worse; they employ frustrated people as class teachers, those who don't care about the children so the kids are left to themselves.

To be continued next week…………
Bukola Afolabi Ogunyeye
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Articles by Bukola Afolabi ogunyeye