Many Chijioke Wigwes in USA and Britain
A gbacha o so, a guo mile (when the race is finished, the miles are counted) was a lyric from one of the golden voices of the legendary Osita Osadebe. The economic downturn perpetrated by the military juntas and the subsequent misrule of the civilian
administrations in our country in the time past, that has made it difficult for those in diaspora to leave their host countries after studies for Nigeria, and the mindless emigration of Nigerians at home to overseas for elusive fortune will forever has unmitigated effects on the nation. Every year we count on the number of billions of dollars sent home to Nigeria by those in Diaspora that are supposedly stimulating the local economy, but we chose to neglect the devastations caused in the families of those outside the country.
Out of commission or omission, many of us have overstayed in our host countries that we forget that we come from somewhere; that at one time or the other, we will head home either alive or in caskets. Some have no single block mounted in their father compound as a house and others refused to improve themselves and the certificate they had when they left Nigeria is still the certificate they still possess; in this case going home becomes unattractive.
Many of us have children, Ikechi Umunna, Dayo Ogunjobi, Osaze Igbinedion, Etim Akpabio, all sound Nigeria, but in actual fact, they are African American children, they are not Nigerian, they don't speak the language and they have no knowledge of the critical cultural mores of our dear country, Nigeria, but their parents are full Nigerians. Most of us are trapped and the only wise man I have seen since I have been in USA is Justin Ezeanioma, who had all his children in Los Angeles, but sent all of them home to school and have the culture, speak the language and behave like human beings, and only to come back to USA to continue their education in University level. My friend, Justin told me that it was a war between him and his wife, but he put his foot down that these children must go home and now, his wife is enjoying it more than her husband. If you go to Justin's house, those children would come and say greetings in a respectful way that you begin to wonder the irreversible mistakes some of us have made and wont to make.
Many have tried to do what Justin did but their 'Thatcheric' wives refused and many can remember one professor of computer science in New Jersey, who is still cooling his head in Jail, because he sent two of his children home, to learn the culture and his wife reported him to the authority of USA that he abducted their children. The Nigerian culture is repressive to our women in some cases, but not all men misuse that to maltreat women, and I know some men who have gone overboard too. There is also countless number of women, who misuse the power given to them by the governments of USA and Britain to send our men to early grave or jail term. I am of the view that we need to make some adjustments when we found ourselves in a foreign culture due to the demand of time and pressure, but our women have gone nuclear, especially some of the illiterate nurses, who work round the clock to make unholy money.
I don't believe that a woman has no say, it is not in this present day and age, but we have our way of life that delineates the functions of a woman and that of a man. Our men are also guilty of this, but the presumptuousness with which our women carry themselves in the western world is unbelievable and nasty. A Nigerian lady I met in one of the offices in Los Angeles engaged me in discussion and he told me how she harasses her husband with threat of sending him to jail if he opens his mouth. This is real and many women beat their husbands to pulp and when police is called, the woman would lie and the man is taken out and booked for domestic violence.
I have heard marriages that stood up to twenty years in Nigeria only to break after one year the man brought his wife to USA and in Britain. Our women are now more dangerous to live with than foreign women, especially the illiterate ones that make up education by evening classes, and they over copy the host culture, surpassing the owners of the land. In Houston and Los Angeles, they have association called divorced women nurses association. Most of them jump from one man to other, they claim that they have gone to night duty but they are sleeping with doctors and their boyfriends in hotels. This is not a scientific research, but eight out of ten Nigerian marriages in USA and Britain end in divorce and the children are the greatest losers.
I am not absolving the evil deeds of men, but most of the time, these women are trained by the sweat of these men from the rudimentary stages of nursing till the so called Registered Nurse (RN), while others in various levels of university education, only to leave the man the moment money starts rolling. Do you want me to write the bad influences of mothers-in-law? When they come to be with their daughter after child birth, they stay put and start looking for green card and at a blink of an eye, the running marriage screeches to halt. The worst mistake anybody can do is to marry from a poor family; try it and see.
Some of our women are becoming crafty and wayward. A man prepared papers for his wife to come to USA, she was given green card in Nigeria and when the guy went to pick his wide at the airport, the lady was nowhere to be seen and after waiting for a long time, he left and he called home and he was told that his wife was seen off at the Lagos airport, only for his wife to land in Atlanta to meet his boyfriend. There are lots fairy tales coming out of USA and Britain, most are the stories of our women hell bent on destroying the hands that fed them.
No culture is the best, but the rotten culture of USA and Britain that stifles the power and leadership of men is doing irreversible damages to families and the couples from our country, Nigeria are the latest victims. These cultures are not supportive of marriages, but some of our deranged women do not see or hear. USA and other western countries are using money to destroy the cultures of other countries through free money to various NGOs and hear these frustrated , money hungry feminists demeaning our culture for a mere dollar and pound sterling.
There are many Dr. Chijioke Wigwes in USA and Britain and the painful aspect of it all is that the public usually rush to judgment and many men who claiming to be 'been tos' vomit all kinds of nonsense; just to please women. The testimony of Nelson Wigwe will serve as a lesson to all of us who play to the peoples' gallery. It has also happened in Los Angeles, when one man form Anambra could have been sent to a jail term of 25 years, but his children gave astounding testimonies that arrested the ugly hand of the Judge's gavel. The Jezebel, his wife has already taken over the man's business, but she was put to shame by the invisible hands of God. I employ the Nigerian government to be smart in handling the Wigwe's case and the only way to do this is to call Daniel to judgment. By Chukwuma Iwuanyanwu, a Ph.D. student writes from Los Angeles.