DECEIVED INTO MARRYING AN AFTER ONE?
Gloria is a pretty young lady. She is the dream of every man. She became pregnant after her mother died in a motor accident on her way back from the village. She was deceived by her fiancÃ© who assured her that he would marry her if she gets pregnant for him. She cooperated after a prolonged disagreement with Wole, her fiance.
When she was seven months pregnant the relationship went sour. Wole relocated and left no forwarding address.
Gloria suffered and managed to deliver a baby girl.
Life must just go on, she said. She took her daughter to one of her aged surviving cousins for fostering.
After about three years, she met Andrew, an engineer, who showered her with love and attention. Eventually, they decided to tie the knot in a big way. But throughout their courtship, she never told Andrew that she had a child out of wedlock. Andrew loved her so much that he married her. Five years into their marriage which was blessed with two children, Gloria's past was unraveled.
Wole, her former love, who absconded and left her to suffer re-surfaced. Surprisingly he located her whereabouts and after much argument and no apology, they couldn't make-up . He instead demanded custody of his child, right before Andrew. To Andrew, it seemed like a dream. Gloria didn't find it funny either as it would be difficult to explain at this crucial moment.
What would you do if you were deceived into marrying a single parent after one or two children out of wedlock?
It is difficult to decide what to do, especially when it involved a church wedding. In such a situation, one should just accept such fate and pray to God for the grace to bear it all because unfaithfulness will still be there. But if it's a court wedding, one could file a divorce.
If there is real love between us two, we could still continue though there could be elements of doubts sometimes.
May God have mercy on us all. I know it could not have been his sincere desire hiding such an issue from me. I am also a human being. He might think I could have turned him down should he disclose that to me.
As we all know, not every woman likes to live with another woman's child in her home. We all try to protect our homes against danger and trouble.
In this case, I would forgive him on the condition that my home must not suffer on account of the mother of his child or the child in question. If he had told me earlier, I believe we could have found a solution to such a problem either by reconciling him with the child's mother, so that she could also gain access to her child and be at peace. It's not a crime and should not be a stigma being a single parent.
I'll not divorce him again. I will let him know how bad I feel. I would have preferred it, if he had told me the truth. and would have accepted the child, because I truly love him .
After, I would think about how many ways he must have been deceiving me.
Being a single parent is not a crime, but I will be angry at first, then later I'll listen to his reason for not disclosing it to me for so long and even during our courtship . If his reason is genuine then I will take it as my fate and we will carry on with our life together, because if I contemplate leaving him for another person, what do I know the other person has in stock for me in life?
It's not bad. I will go ahead with him , but I will suggest that couples should learn to talk all things through while dating or courting.
What a question! We would sought it out if I love him. But it also depends. I would not allow myself to be deceived all in the name of love, because if he could deceive me now he could do worse. The world is full of deceit and only God can help and see us through.
It could disappoint me, but there is no innocent person on earth. We all have one secrete or the other.
Since our God is a merciful and gracious father, and He could accept us back despite our heinous crimes, who then am I not forgive her? After all we all were once sinners and Christ innocently gave His life for the remission of our sins.
That is wicked. Why would I trust her again? I would divorce her.
Since the relationship was built on deceit, it could be difficult to enjoy such a marriage any further. The woman should know this. But since we are believers, we should try to put the past right far behind us and see it as a mistake anyone could commit.
Whatever made a woman I had courted several years to hide that from me, means she could also have an evil plan against me for decades without telling me. I know she might be afraid I might not accept her and her love child, but honestly, she should have told me
I might let her continue as my wife. Where would I send her? After all she was just trying to be on a safer side.
If my husband hurts me like that, I will forgive him, because no man is perfect. We are bound to make mistakes. I will accept him if he is ready to apologize for what he has done; if only he still loves me.