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I had the privilege of attending a friend's traditional wedding recently. He was an old school mate of mine. The wedding was a well- planned, well-attended and a stomach-friendly one. Of course, its good to have a variety of foods at a party. At least, you get to eat something you've never tried out before.

The wedding was a blessing in disguise for me. One, it gave me the opportunity to see some old friends I've lost contact with, and then secondly, it was also a time to play catch-up on gists about the latest developments on how life's been treating some of us. Forget what anyone tells you, the truth is that anytime there is a gathering of people, there is always something extra to gist about especially if you sit close to a lively, friendly person.

Back to what I was saying. As the "old school" friends sat round the table remembering school days and reflecting about life and also feeling happy for
our friend and school mate who decided to settle down at last, after yabis from different quarters, this issue of who should have more money in the family came

Philip was of the personal opinion that no matter how long it takes, it is better for a man to wait until he is rich or comfortable enough before getting married. If a woman is richer than her husband, she tends to want to control him and might end up making him a house boy.....(slave).

Joshua, another friend of ours said the reason why most men run away from ladies who have "made it" or who have "enough pepper" is not because they don't
love them, but because they feel these ladies might end up turning them into rags, slaves, foot mats, etc.

Bayo and Emeka totally supported what Phillip said. George and Monday on the other hand, were on the side of Joshua. Lekan and myself were the only
ones who didn't support either Phillip's or Joshua's point of view, so they eagerly asked for our personal opinion.

I told them that it doesn't really matter if the lady is financially stronger than her man. The whole thing is about personal upbringing, moral values and respect for your partners. Men sometimes feel threatened by the hard work, success and wealth of a lady, and assume she will be a terror and maybe a bitch at home. Sometimes it is not true. In as much as I want to agree that there are a lot of cases of ladies who are well-off treating their husbands like slaves. I have also seen men who are big shots, super rich and holding top positions in their organisations, still their wives control or better still, treat them like a slave at home, even when they are full time housewives with no financial contribution to the home.

Any woman who treats her man badly, may be doing so, not because she is richer than him, but because she is just tough and have personal complex problems which she feels being domineering will cover up.

We all talked about different couples we know and how it has been in the marriage thing. I will save that part of the story for another day.

But, seriously, what is your view about this? Please write in and share your personal opinion with me. It will be published on CALABASH with Emmanuel