IF A LADY PROPOSES TO YOU…?
Love, according to Michael Bolton, is a wonderful thing and when a man loves a woman, guess what happens. Likewise when a lady falls in love for the very first time, she is ecstatic. She capers about like a little lamb in enthusiasm and becomes a changed person overnight.
Is it a taboo for ladies to propose to men they love? Have we forgotten that what men can do, a woman also can do at times?
In fact, I have no contrary opinion to this. I love bold people, people who do not fake their persons. But there are ways to go about it. It necessarily might not be the common verbal thing, as action speaks louder than words.
A mere expression by body language would definitely send a signal to him. I do not mean action in terms of seduction. That could destroy all you have dreamed, lived and laboured for.
Though, it depends on our maturity, one to another, but i think it is not as bad as to be nailed to the cross.
In fact, it is freedom of expression, as contained in the constitution.
It happens on daily basis, or would an uncle tell you his wife proposed to him? No, it is left for you to make public to the entire world how you met each other.
But the question remains, how would you feel, if a lady proposes to you? Here are some responses from a number of guys.
It is no big deal if a lady walks up to me and proposes. I will see it a great privilege. Before a lady could walk to me and tell me she loves or likes me, it means she must have gone through hell to await my own proposal which eventually did not work out.
It is good she liberates herself because love is terribly a damn good thing. You just cannot hide the feeling. If it occurs to me, and of course she is this particular girl I liked, but could not confront her due to my timid nature, I will just tell her I actually was studying her as well, but deep down me, it is not true; so she would not think she asked me out herself. I believe before she could come out bold, we must have at least been friends for some time, so the friendship is what eventually graduate to true relationship. I will not spurn her. Instead, I think it will strengthen the relationship.
She could be a very good wife material, because she really understands the principles of love and would guide it carefully and jealously.
It depends on the circumstances of her proposal to me. But whatever happens, I might decide whether to accept or reject her, because it might be she is just infatuated.
Irrespecive of her personality not, I would not be comfortable with such a proposal because women can be very funny and mischievous these days. Believe me, men tend to misuse the advances from a woman in the long run.
There is nothing wrong in it, but this is Africa where many things happen .
I remember my first girl at the university was the one that proposed to me. She was quite pretty, faithful and from a very powerful background as well.
But I think I just was not so crazy about it and she later dumped me. Funny enough, it was after she dumped me that I started going crazy about her but it was too late. So, you see most men only appreciate what they suffered to get.
It does not mean she is a flirt or a wayward . No, we all have our individual ways and we best understand one another. It is no crime, as it is no crime to reject or accept one's proposals.
That is the best way she can liberate herself from the bondage of love and emotion.
Just because Africa has a different culture from the western world does not mean we should condemn certain things, although just a few ladies could do such. Thank God for such ladies.
At least they can help shy guys who cannot stand the heat of the day in terms of love expression. Whatever has disadvantages also an advantage.
If a lady proposes to me, I will forever live to respect her.
Because for her to break out from the shell of culture and tradition, I think she will be a good person to live with. I would not consider her naughtiness or waywardness but rather appreciate her boldness and courage. You know sometimes a guy may not have such boldness to propose to a lady, so, I think she should help him out.
There is this saying I love that goes thus: 'the biggest emotional bondage is to see and have access to someone you love but you could not say it'.
I see the lady trying to set herself free from the emotional bondage she finds herself in .
I advise that such ladies apply wisdom to their approach, because some men might really not see it that way.
This is common with ladies of today.
For a lady to propose to a guy without any fear of what the outcome would be is against African culture and it's beliefs. The Bible emphasizes that 'He who finds a wife finds favour from God and man, not otherwise.
But I will go with the Nigerian or African culture of a man proposing to a lady, because I would love and appreciate her more, remembering the stress and difficulty I went through in the process of wooing her.
Simply, I will see her as cheap and I think such a girl must have been irresponsible.
If a lady proposes to me, I mean if a lady walks up to me and tells me she wants us to be dating, I will disappoint her by talking sense into her. Although, there could be times a lady would love a man and the man is shy or does not know how to express his feelings for her.
If such is the situation, instead of doing it herself, she could have helped him better by making the friendship strong enough, that the guy would develop the courage to open up to her. It is quite unfortunate that most ladies might be embarrassed as a result.
For me, it is not the best thing for ladies to propose to men, except they are too intimate and she could just stylishly ask him, perhaps during conversation, 'Tomi, are you really sure you love me, and you believe you can marry me'. I mean this is better and more acceptable than just saying it directly.
Ha! If that happens it means trouble is looming, the world is at its end. I am an African and I don't believe a woman should make the first move at all.
She can express her love and all of that, but she should allow me to make the move.
To me such relationships do not last, perhaps it is because of the African in me. I will just let her know that I do not feel it would last.