Consensual Premarital Sex, Is It Right Or Wrong??

By Edikan Ekanem
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Never, never be afraid to do what is right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society's punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Ordinarily, I do not comment on issues like this because of twin reason:

1) I believe that all of us will render account of our deeds and conducts to Jehovah God being good or bad.

2) It may amount to peering into Individual’s private life and his personal dignity.

Because of these reason, I always refrain myself from encapsulating on issues like this. This one am writing is out of hand; to me the situation needs to be handled with kid gloves because many lives are at stake, people are seriously mislead.

Early this morning I read from an online news medium ( yabaletonine.com ) that sex before marriage is ok as long as it is mutually pleasurable. “A pastor has authored a book which says it is okay for singles to indulge in sex before marriage, Christian or not” Says the source

The source added “Having sex outside marriage even though accepted by society is frowned upon by Christians. An author, Bromleigh McCleneghan, has attempted to explain why it may be okay to actually indulge in ‘guilt-free’ sex even as a single Christian who doesn’t conform to the world (okay na).”

According to her, it is okay to have sex along as it is“mutually pleasurable and affirming“. She also said it is not by force to stay off sex, especially if you became single by circumstance.

More so the source continue “The married mother of three who is also an associate pastor at the Union Church of Hinsdale in Chicago, USA, said it is also great to be faithful to your sexual partner, even if you are both unmarried”.

My grouses and my questions are: what is the sole message that this woman pastor is conveying to the masses? What is she orchestrating? What is the gamut of her exposition? When did the pleasure and mutual agreement became the yardstick for determining a particular sexual intercourse is right or wrong as against the parties involved? Is she a sane human or is she really God send? Am not trying to belittle his power as a woman of god neither do I question her credibility, that one is best known to her and her God.

If I am deep in sexual immorality, I have no reason whatsoever to encourage others to indulge in this act; it is against the scriptural laws and public policy. Why would this woman not keep this thought to herself than misleading the public?

It is imperative to state that the level in which a particular sin is permeating the world does not make the act not to be a sin again. No matter how prevalent rape, stealing or theft, sexual immorality and murder are, they will still remain a sin, what is bad is bad, black is black, no amount of fantasy or polishing will turn it white.

The phrases that really instigate this writing are” it is okay to have sex along as it is “mutually pleasurable and affirming””, “it is not by force to stay off sex, especially if you became single by circumstance” and “The married mother of three who is also an associate pastor at the Union Church of Hinsdale in Chicago, USA, said it is also great to be faithful to your sexual partner, even if you are both unmarried”. These three phrases is a slap to humanity, public policy, morality, good conscience and the scriptures most importantly. What a mess! What a disgrace! What an act of hypocrisy!

In rebutting and debugging the above assertion, I will say that it is a settled moral and scriptural standard that premarital and extra marital sex is WRONG. Jehovah’s standard regarding sex has not changed, it is still a sin, and no amount of indulgence can change this set standard. We cannot even say that we do not know that premarital sex is a sin without being told.

The Greek word “porneia” and the Latin word “fornicatio” is translated to mean all unlawful sexual relations. These include prostitution, unclean habits, brazen conducts and homosexuality. It is clearly and unequivocally stated in the scriptures that fornication and adultery is a sin.

Does it mean that if this woman becomes single by circumstances, maybe by death of her spouse, she would be going about sleeping with bachelors as long as the sexual intercourse is mutually agreed and pleasurable? Or does it mean that she as a mother or a mother to be would advise her daughter to go about sleeping with people as long as the sexual intercourse is mutually agreed and pleasurable? To me, this seems to be an evidence of lunatic or insanity because no sane man will say such as said above on air.

In the northern part of the country persons can be charged and prosecuted for adultery as a criminal offence under the penal code. If human on earth frowns at unlawful sexual activities, how much more God who is the originator of sex life, that started it with a grand purpose?

I did not come to preach anyway but it will be wise to sprinkle some key scriptures that forbid premarital and extramural sexual relations.

1) Now the works of the flesh are plainly seen, and they are sexual immorality, uncleanness, brazen conduct, idolatry… that those who practice such things will not inherit God’s Kingdom. Galatians 5:19-21

2) Keep abstaining from things sacrificed to idols, from blood, from what is strangled, and from “sexual immorality”. If you carefully keep yourselves from these things, you will prosper. Good health to you! Acts 5:29

3) Flee from sexual immorality! Every other sin that a man may commit is outside his body, but whoever practices sexual immorality is sinning against his own body. Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? Also, you do not belong to yourselves for you were bought with a price. By all means, glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

We should never be misled that what so ever a man sows he will reap.

“Let marriage be honourable among all, and let the marriage bed be without defilement, for God will judge sexually immoral people and adulterers” Hebrews 13:4

I will render account of all my deeds and actions to Jehovah God including my sex life likewise all humans. It has gotten to the peak, the apex and the climax so, we need to curb this menace.

I will conclude with this extract of an outstanding state man, a leader and lover of God: An individual who breaks a law that conscience tells him is unjust, and who willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment in order to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice, is in reality expressing the highest respect for the law - Martin Luther King Jr.

Edikan Ekanem is a student of University of Uyo, a writer, a columnist, a literal observer, an analyst and remains politically neutral. He can be reached at: 08130015006, [email protected] .

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